How do you continue to live..

RSS
Email

0 Kudo

Author	Comment
Painlrd	How do you continue to live..	Lead	[-]
Posts: 6 (01/23/04 01:30:15) OCPM Newbie Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	Tags : None Hello all Just stumbled upon this place looking for chronic pain websites.My story...Well,I am a 26 yr old male suffering from chronic testicle pain,Actually everything down there hurts.Its been 3 years so far.1 Surgery that did no good.The first year i couldn't even get out of bed..Well i could walk 10 feet to the bathroom but thats about it.I was studying martial arts(wich i have been my entire life)so i could one day pass on the knowledge and become a instructor. Of course that is all gone now,Ive been to doctors who told me the pain was all physcological and nothing is wrong with me(yet when i got surgery they found other stuff wrong that didn't show on any test's they had given me) I live in my bed basicly,Somedays i can get up..go out for a few hours but its rare.I am a musician also..wich i can hardly even play my instrument most of the time. Ive taken tons of medication,neurontin,percs,fentanyl patches,methadone ..the list goes on. Now something is wrong with my stomach,Ive lost 30 pounds in under 2 months.Can hardly eat food at all..Docs don't know what wrong,Nor do they belive anything i say. I don't even know the reason of me posting this...I fugured you all could relate. For a man to have a problem down there..with pain,Its a horrible way to live. Not being able to do martial arts,Make music..Its horrible.I ask myself daily why i continue to live. I've always been very emotional and sort of "romantic"lol..oh god that sounds gay haha..I was single when this all started so therfor of course i am still single.Can you imagine a female wanting a man who could never please her...It will never happen I hope alot of you have someone to be with throughout all your struggles.I have to say i have never felt more alone..I live with my folks..they are pretty much worthless when it comes to talking about all this stuff,They woulkd rather push everything into the back of their head and act like nothing is wrong.christ..My sister lives here too and she is HIV positive and my folks are moving to hawaii in 3 years and just leaving us here to rot and die basicly..nice people huh? I hope alot of you have people that care about you and can comfort you in your time of need.I never imagined this would happen to me.When i don't look like a corpse i am a decent looking guy..but again..to females i am now useless. I don't even know if you people will read all of this,I still don't even know why i posted all of this,Its my problem not anyone elses.. I just feel like its pointless to go on,I am only 26 and had my entire life ahead of me.Now its all gone..Evert love i had is gone..martial arts..music..the comfort of a beautiful female..all gone.I know i sound a bit dramatic here but yanno..its just how i feel and how it is. They say everything happens for a reason,Well i have changed alot in the past 3 years,When i can play my music..Its dramaticly improved with alot of emotion into it.but its rare i even feel good enough,Mentally i am a completely different person,But the knowledge i have achieved going through this battle.I can never use.What good are you when you are stuck in a room all the time,In pain,Depressed,Lonely ect ect. Well thats enough of my pathetic story Take care everyone,May your days be as best as they can.I sure as hell you all don't think like me either lol..I see no point in living anymore Take care.
swmeg	Re: How do you continue to live..	#1	[-]
OCPM Hall of Fame Member Posts: 5107 (01/23/04 02:43:58) OCPM Hall of Fame Member&OCPM Forum Host Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	Living with cp is a very difficult way to live my friend. Youhave just did the first step. You seeked out help. you found companionship here with us. You needed to talk to someone and you just did tell your story. You had alot that you needed to get out and you did it. It is too difficult keeping all that in us and let it build up. It needed to vent itself out, You have found a wonderful caring place here, we will do whatever we can to help you. Alot of us have been where you are today and some of us still are there, It is hard to move past being angry, it is hard to accept that this is our new life now. I am a fortunate one, i have many who love and care about me. EzCode Parsing Error: color=green size=4]I am married with two teenage boys and they all help me out tremendously. And I know I am much loved from my family. I still have my parents and they areboth disabled as well. I inhereited most all my health problems from them both. My siblings didnt get one health problem from them but I am past being bitter about that. EzCode Parsing Error: color=green size=4]I have many days i dont want to get out of bed. i just want to roll over and stayt here for ever. I use to want to die, alot. , still have the odd day like that but now i know when i feel like that its not genuine as i do want to live, i want to be a grandmother someday and a motherinlaw. I want to be the best one ever. Though by then i doubt i will even be able to hold my grandchild but i can always lay beside I still have many many dreams that i want to fulfil. I am not sure if any are possible but i am no longer ready to give . Even though every day is a struggle my husband and boys are good enough reason for me to live one more day. But we have several members here who are also single and they will have their own story to tell you. Our days are long and filled with misery mostly if by ourselves. But if you stay here with us we will do our best to give you company and friendship. You need both an we can help you. Everyone needs some type of support There is no judging here. only caring and loving friendship. And NO your post was not too long I love a romantic so no that part was not gay. I am glad you got all that out i think ti was long overdue. I f you ever watn to chat we have a chatroom and if it shows a person or persons in there just enter. Of if you wish to chat just post a time and someoen will try to meet u there. I will look forward to getting to know you. So now just relax and let it all happen. Let your heart guide you, it whispers, so listen closely SweetMeg
Unregistered(d)	I don't even know what to say	#2	[-]
Posts: 0 (01/23/04 09:00:04) Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	I'm so sad. I wish I was an angel...I would make all of this go away, or atleast help people understand what the "reasons" are. I know that's not what God wants for us - more instant gratification - it's just that we are human and it's difficult understanding His will and His plan for us at times. I will include you in my prayers - prayer does help miracles happen - atleast it has in my life. I'm glad you stumbled upon this place. This will be good for you. The people here are warm, kind, understanding, compassionate, just good - ya know? There may be bumps along the way here sometimes, but it remains a safe and respectful refuge for all. I hope you find the solace here that I have. Sincerely
out2lunch	Re: I don't even know what to say	#3	[-]
OCPM Hall of Fame Member Posts: 4170 (01/23/04 10:22:37) OCPM Hall of Fame Member&OCPM Forum Host Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	Hi Pain, welcome aboard!!! I'm so sorry noone was here for you last night, but we are now!! I too am so glad you found us, and you will be too! You'll never find a warmer more compassionate place to be!! I'm so sorry for what you're having to go through, and at such a young age!!! What you say your parents are up to, is crimminal to say the least!! I have 3 children, and couldn't even imagine abandoning them, especially if they need me as much as you need yours!!! When you say, finding a woman to comfort you is impossible, I have to disagree!! There are plenty of ways of pleasing a woman without intercourse, not to mention not all relationships revolve around that!! Let's not forget that there's still a possibility that you could find someone to truly help you medically!!! Please try not to give up hope!!! I know it's easier said then done, but you obviously still have some fight in you! Meg's right about not worrying how long your post is, none of us compare posts sizes etc. We all just want to be here for eachother and vice versa!! I'm married with children too, but that doesn't mean it's so much better/easier!! I've been living with chronic spine problems for over 6yrs now, and it's caused alot of problems in my marriage too!! I know many here will agree with me, that chronic pain's made it quite difficult/impossible in the intimacy department too!! My pain may not be where yours is, but it's still next to impossible to continue that part of my marriage!! Which is also hard when your partner doesn't truly understand why you can't, or doesn't believe you!! In order to survive a life with chronic pain, you have to remember a few things.........keep your thoughts away from what you used to do, take each day as it comes, and reach out here as much as you need to!! Think of us as that support system you're not getting at home!!! We'll do whatever we can to help you through each obstacle that comes your way! We've all either been there, are there, or will be there again!!! But, together we can get through!!! Please don't hesitate to post whatever you feel (we don't judge), and if you'd like to chat, just post for one like Meg also said!! I look forward to getting to know you as well!! If there's anything I can do to help you, please let me know! Take care!! you're friend
Unregistered(d)	DO YOU SEE WHAT I MEAN!!!!!	#4	[-]
Posts: 0 (01/23/04 11:32:36) Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	Don't ya just wish you could reach through the computer screen and give these folks a big 'ole smooch??!! I'm so glad you found your way here!! Congratulations! You couldn't have found a better place if you paid millions of dollars!!! Your new friend, Fritzy
cynderdiscs	Hey There!!	#5	[-]
OCPM - 100 Club Posts: 198 (01/23/04 12:00:53) Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	I am so sorry for all that you have been through and so glad that you found thiis sight.I too suffer from chronic pain since back surgery in 98-It sucks I agree it causes a ton of other problems besided pain-changes your whole way of life makes ppl you love look at you differently-ppl do not understand chronic pain until it happens to them.Here you can vent you can screech and you can share happy moments-those being the most precious.I just said last night why do I even stick around?! Yes I have kids and that's my main reason and because I know however bad this gets and it does get bad that in the words of dear mental Scarlet tomorrow is another day!!! I know how angry and depressed you are have gone through it and still do-The main thing to remember is that you are alone no longer-you have all of us here to listen and help and just be there-You Take Care-Cyndi
cyn999	Hi Pain	#6	[-]
Posts: 11793 (01/23/04 13:39:32) OCPM Founding Member &Board ezOp Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	I agree with Meg. You need to find someone that will take an interest in your condition. Your depression is understandable...and will only continue if you dont get help. What is your email address? Well, write me if you want at: cyn@cpmission.com Maybe I can help. Take care...and try to keep the faith. Hope to hear from you soon. cyn
Skysoul	Note to pain from Big Jim	#7	[-]
Posts: 952 (01/23/04 17:07:24) Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	I could not agree more that you hhave stumbled on the greatest pain lifeline in the world. The people here at OCPM all displsy an unusual level of consistant intelligent input. I can no longer do a long post because my own pain levels are way beyond the imagination. Suffice to say that like you, I can see little if any reason to stay alive and in fact, I pray to die in my sleep daily. I am blessed however with the greatest wife any man could have. It is my second marriage aand she is an angel on earth. I also have my 83 yr old mom who is my rock and a most loving daughter. The staff at the long term care facility is trying very hard to make things better. I cry for you because of your young age. For a person as young as you to suffer like you are is nothing less than tragic. I am a retired radio announcer. I did a music show and l loved it. I sometimes find that listening to favourites in earphones helps to teke my mind of of pain a bit or building models. All I can say is God bless you and if you have found OCPM he does. Big Jim
cyn999	Glad to hear that Big Jim....	#8	[-]
Posts: 11793 (01/23/04 17:57:01) OCPM Founding Member &Board ezOp Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	I'm glad to hear you dive into music and such, with a headset on. Music is one of my great joys too. What kind of music do you like? I listen to it all, pretty much....except Opera. Can't take that stuff. Glad to see you returning more!! It can only HELP.....right? Right. Love ya, cyn
Painlrd	thanks all	#9	[-]
Posts: 6 (01/24/04 01:57:58) OCPM Newbie Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	Hello Thanks for all replies,I Can;t express in words how nice you all seem here. I am a little out of it now from all the meds,I want to write alot more but i really can't right now(can barely sit up)I'll do my best Its amazing,You all show more concern than my own parents...They really are lost.My father has chronic pain also..Very bad back and hip pain.But he uses this to become a full blown junky.Granted he is in alot of pain most of the time..He has been a junky for as far as i can remember now.He gets so messed up he can barely speak sometimes.My mother treats my father like one should treat their kid while ignoring me and my sis.She doesn't even know she is doing it. Oh well..what can you do. I have some friends that care about my health but they really don't understand.Either they are completely speachless or just keep telling me it will get better(wich aint ever going to happen) I was happy to hear you all have people that care for you.I think that is very important thing for people going through chronic pain.I know not having that doesn't help too much. I am not a religous person at all.I won't really go into that because i don't want to upset anyone .But nobody has to pray for me or anything heh.No god could be this cruel to us.(please don't be offended,Everyone has their own idea of whats out there thats all)But i thank everyone for their kind words. Big Jim..I listen to music alot too,Music has been a huge part of my life since i was really young.I listen to everything from the heaviest of music to Mozart(the best musician ever to walk this earth!!heh)It helps alot.Sometimes it brings me down too though.Specially some of the classical music,There is just so much emotion into the music.Alot of the great composers didn't live great lives either..You can hear it in their music. I really wish i had people close to me like you all do..I know ive said that a million times already lol.It haunts me day and night. Definitly getting a little woozy over here from all the meds,Time to lay back down and lay there like a corpse,Half concious and half asleep(i'm sure you all know that drugged feeling from narcotics) I really am thankfull for everyones input,It may not seem it but i am just a bit out of it at the moment.My first post wasnt even half od the horror..Its even worse than that lol.My entire life has been one big stinking pile of poop I'll be reading the board daily thanks again everyone
uneedaklu	You do have people close to you	#10	[-]
Posts: 60 (01/25/04 08:18:11) Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	You have us. No matter how supportive our spouses/parents/kids, etc. are, if they're not living the kind of pain we are, they don't get it. We do, and we're here for you. Daytime, night time (a lot of us don't sleep much) - so pop on in anytime. We'll be here. Everything happens for a reason -Amy
cyn999	PAIN.....	#11	[-]
Posts: 11793 (01/25/04 15:58:14) OCPM Founding Member &Board ezOp Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	YOU "DO" HAVE PEOPLE CLOSE TO YOU! *RIGHT HERE!* SURE, WE MAY NOT KNOW YOUR DETAILS.... WE MAY NOT KNOW YOU REAL WELL YET.... BUT WE KNOW PAIN AND BELIEVE ME, SHARING IT WITH OTHERS IS A HEALING SOURCE IN ITSELF. YOU ARE MISERABLE AND RIGHTLY SO. OUTSIDERS CAN BE SO WEIRD WHEN IT COMES TO UNDERSTANDING OUR PAIN. ALOT OF US HERE USED TO HAVE FRIENDS AND SUCH BEFORE OUR CPAIN... BUT FOR MOST OF US, THEY DISAPPEARED, ONE BY ONE.... AS PAIN MADE ITSELF AT HOME. MY FRIENDS ARE HERE....I CAN TELL THEM ANYTHING....AND FEEL ALOT BETTER. YOU NEED TO COME BACK AND VISIT WITH US MORE. I JUST CAN'T HELP BUT THINK IT WILL DO YOU ALOT OF GOOD. DONT FORGET....THE MENTAL EFFECTS THE PAIN. AND VISA VERSA. YOU ARE DEPRESSED BUT I THINK WE CAN HELP IN THAT DEPT. WANNNA GIVE IT A SHOT? KEEP YOUR CHIN UP.... IT DON'T LOOK GOOD DRAGGIN' ON THE FLOOR! HOPE TO SEE YOU SOON.... CYN
cyn999	AIN'T THAT THE TRUTH AMY	#12	[-]
Posts: 11793 (01/25/04 15:59:39) OCPM Founding Member &Board ezOp Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	THE ONLY PEOPLE THAT UNDERSTAND.... ARE OTHERS WITH CHRONIC PAIN
Painlrd	question	#13	[-]
Posts: 6 (01/25/04 22:51:42) OCPM Newbie Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	Hello all..thanks again I was wondering what medications you all take?I was just on a fentanyl patch but it wasn't doing much at all... I just switched back to methadone wich helps but i am always in a zombie like state. I tell ya...the more i think about how my parents are leaving me and my sis here and moving out of the country in a few years..It really pisses me off.My sister was born deaf,Ended up HIV positive..has had a terrible life and they haven't helped her out that much at all.They gave us a place to live and thats about it.My parents want a grand a month for the house when they leave or i guess we have to leave.Nice people huh.. I feel obligated to take care of my sister too.She gets SSI but it isnt all that much.I don't think i could get it as ive never really worked that much before all this pain.I always did martial arts or worked on my music..I don't have the energy or strength to deal with all the crap that i would have to go through to even attempt to get it. Hell..Right now i am suppose to call the referal department for my insurence company beccause for some dumb reason they denied paying for my surgery.I Just dont have the energy to deal with these people..I hate talking to people on the phone,I am very very anti social,I Always have been,Its even worse now.I dunno...it really seems hopeless Depression...Well i just don;t see any way of getting that to go away,Sure i have days that arent as bad as others.But every love i have ever had has been taken away from me,Before i even had a chance to enjoy life.It just seems completely hopeless... Martial arts..gone forever,Music..Hardly feel like playing anymore...a relationship.Impossible.Sure there may be females out there that don't care about sex all the time.But to have me be practicly a cripple on top of that,There is not a single human being on this planet that would want to be with someone like that. I feel like i am just complaining now..and being pathetic. I apretiate everyone replying and for all the kind words.Its helps a little.But i dunno..It just seems hopeless.Stuck in this room alone with a family that is completely useless(besides my sis)My parents are awfull..I tell ya if i ever had kids...I can;t imagine being the way they are to their own children.I just sit in this room all day by myself rotting away. oops i am still complaining..I will stop now. Take care everyone
swmeg	Re: How do you continue to live..	#14	[-]
OCPM Hall of Fame Member Posts: 5107 (01/25/04 23:35:12) OCPM Hall of Fame Member&OCPM Forum Host Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	Please dont feel that you cant complain. it really does a body good to get it all out. That is what we are here for. to listen, to help to support etc etc. Im glad you posted again. Please keep doing so and type your heart out. And vent all you want. Dont worry about how long it is. if some think its too long there is no rule they have to read it all in one sitting or at all. I have read that if the med you are taking makes you feel out of it and your still having pain then it isnt the proper med to treat you with. I know when I first started on my narcotics I was way out of it the first few days and had wild nightmares. I did dare drive anywhere, I did actually try once and it scared me, I went out for soemthing cant remember now what is was but I waited until my boyd adjusted and it did after a few days. But if it doesnt settle then something is wrong.But then again Im not a Dr and very well could be wrong . As for meds, well I have several different things wrong with me so I take alot of meds. I just happen to be fortunate that I am being adequately treated.As long as I dont fall, (I do fall alot) or to do anyting I shouldnt or overdo it I can keep my pain pretty well under control. Let your heart guide you, it whispers, so listen closely SweetMeg
out2lunch	Re: I don't even know what to say	#15	[-]
OCPM Hall of Fame Member Posts: 4170 (01/26/04 11:25:07) OCPM Hall of Fame Member&OCPM Forum Host Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	Cyn is so right, in that you have family and people that care deeply RIGHT HERE!!! Noone will ever understand your pain, more the us!! Come often, and you'll see how we all help eachother through EVERYTHING chronic pain dishes us!! Take care! you're friend
out2lunch	Re: How do you continue to live..	#16	[-]
OCPM Hall of Fame Member Posts: 4170 (01/26/04 11:31:48) OCPM Hall of Fame Member&OCPM Forum Host Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	Pain, what you're doing, is venting and letting all that's been bottled up so long OUT!!! We don't classify that as whining/complaining here!!! We want you to feel comfortable enough to let it all out, 'cause that's the only way you'll ever survive and find your way out of that pit!!! As for your parents.......all I can suggest, is for you to rise above them!!! Show them you're much stronger then they are and take care of you!! Don't allow yourself to "rot away" in that room of yours!!! First step may be to get to a councellor/dr and get some anti-depressants and come here often!! Noone will ever judge you here, and we only want to help!! Will you take us up on it?? you're friend
scroogerocks	Re: question	#17	[-]
OCPM Hall of Fame Member Posts: 7003 (01/26/04 15:25:03) OCPM Hall of Fame Member&OCPM Forum Host Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	Howdy Painlrd, Well, I read your post and you are not being pathetic more realistic in a painful sort of way. First off, I take methadone and I have found that for me and my lifestyle it seems to work best. I was on oxycontin before which left me totally in la la land, not in a euphoric sort of way either. With the methadone I seem to be more mentally alert and not nearly as depressed as I was with the oxycontin. But each person is different, and each person reacts differently. Well, could you get an appt for you and your sister? Then it wouldn't matter if your parents moved out of the country. How old is your sister? And you? (you don't have to answer my questions if you don't want to). There is no reason to pay such an outrageous price unless that is cheap for your area. I could not imagine my parents being that way. I'm sorry, I don't mean to sound rude but I couldn't. What are some of the things that have been bothering you? Perhaps we can help you work through some issues so that you might be able to find a little bit of hope in this crazy life with pain. When we can no longer do the things that we took for granted in the past, we tend to become depressed and withdraw, I sense this is exactly what is happening with you. But we understand, and you are more than welcome to post anytime about anything. If you share more of your story with us I would greatly appreciate it. Ok, gotta run my eyelids are closing on me. Be well, and know that we are here for you. Traci Together...we can make a difference! - Pancreatic Cancer Action Network - www.pancan.org
cyn999	PAIN....	#18	[-]
Posts: 11793 (01/26/04 16:47:20) OCPM Founding Member &Board ezOp Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	PAIN, YOU KNOW... WHEN YOUR IN THE PIT EVERYTHINGS BLACK THERES NO LIGHT EVERYTHINGS "DARK" THERE'S.... NO HOPE NOTHING LOOKS GOOD NOTHING SOUNDS GOOD YOU HAVE NO GOALS NO DREAMS THERE'S JUST TOTAL BLACKNESS YOU JUST BE REAL CAREFUL...CUZ THE PIT CAN SWALLOW UP...JUST LIKE THAT!! WE LOST A GOOD FRIEND TO THE PIT 2001. SHE HAD CHRONIC PAIN TOO. ALTHOUGH SHE TOOK MEDS, IT WASN'T ENOUGH. THE PAIN WAS MORE THAN SHE COULD BEAR. YOU MIGHT WANT TO READ ABOUT HER HERE: http://www.cpmission.com/main/painpolitics/polarticles/judyh.html BUT I'M FEELING THAT YOUR ISSUES ARE MORE THAN PAIN, AREN'T THEY. WHAT WITH YOUR FOLKS LEAVING AND ALL. AND HEY, THAT'S OK.... WHATEVER THE ISSUES, WE'RE HERE TO HELP YOU. WE WANT TO HELP. ARE YOU TAKING ANY ANTI-DEPRESSANTS? HAS YOUR DOC TREATED YOU FOR YOUR EMOTIONAL SIDE, AS WELL AS PHYSICAL? I'M JUST THINKING MAYBE THIS SHOULD BE ADDRESSED TOO. HOPE YOU POST AGAIN SOON.... CYN
Painlrd	100% pain	#19	[-]
Posts: 6 (01/27/04 05:50:35) OCPM Newbie Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	Hi all. My problem is 100%.If i didn't have this pain i would be teaching martial arts by now.Have my music going..ect Everything is from the pain.Depression is a part of dealing with life.I mean how many people do you know that are 100% happy all the time.Everyone has problems and nobody has a perfect life(well...give it your filthy rich and people with no heart heh). Ive tried anti-depressants..Actually Bi-Polar runs in my family.I was never really a happy person...BUT.I learnt how to deal with it.I don't need anti-depressant meds.I know people on them.A few of my uncles do..Actually my father does belive it or not.BUT...I have seen what it does.It alters your personality,It changes the person that you are.In my opinion it turns you into a drone.I tried amytryptaline once and it was the worse feeling ive ever had. I am not giving up the fight yet.I am still young and there is still a chance i could get fixed one day.I am falling apart though..From being in bed so much other problems are popping up.I have a stomach problem now.It could be a appendix issue..But they have no idea.I am on meds for it and it calms the pain of the stomach down but i can;t eat much food.I've lost 30 pounds in 2 months.Its strange.I think eating healthy for awhile should help. But i have basicly been in bed for 3 years..Its taking its toll.I'm sure some of you know how it feels to lay/sit for a long time/never exercise ect ect. Feels like your just rotting away slowly. I aint giving up yet...But i won't wait forever,After a certain point why bother.I'm not at that point yet though..I can't blame anyone for taking their own life when it gets so bad.Thats just the way i am. I am going to try and start slowly exercising somehow,Its gonna cause me so much pain..But its either that or wait till something goes wrong from laying in bed that effects me in a bad way. Someone asked.I am 26..very young age to have life taken away from you.But thats how it goes.I'm sure there have been alot of younger people. I really wish this stomach problem didn't start happening.When that hurts it feels like a somebody stabbed me in the stomach.They thought it was appendicitus at first but it seems to come and go.Its really weird.Its like something is causing me chronic appendix pain now,wich doesn;t usuallty happen(yet they know shit about the appendix)All my doctors suck..expect the one that did the surgery/The one my insurence company said they won't pay for.(even though their doctor said it was ok to see him and he thought it was a good idea)I have to fight the appeal but haven';t called yet...I think i mentioned that before.I forget what i typed already here sometimes heh. I am feeling a little better at the moment..It won;t last though..I might have a ok few hours here and there but thats about it. Has anyone taken Neurontin?This stuff actually seems to help.But the stuff was originally made for people with seisures(spelling)Wich seems kinda messed up.Who knows what damage it could be doing to me.As soon as i stopped taking it(was on it for about a year)thats when i started having stomach pains...I am taking it again now though because i can't deal with how much pain i am in without it.It helps more than narcotics i think.I just doubt its safe to take.It will most likely cause some damage or already has has...All these new drugs,They know hardly anything about them or what they can do long term. If things have't gotten better by the time i am 30..I'll just end going loony and maybe complete insanity will take away the pain
gabby196	Re: How do you continue to live..	#20	[-]
Posts: 34 (01/27/04 11:55:14) OCPM Newbie Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	Hi my friend in pain. My name is Fabian, The Gabby one. I am so glad you found this group. I am new to. I joined last week. And have meet some great people here. They have so much care for everyone. it is just great here. I belong to a lot of pain groups and most are great I have found this group one of the very best of the best. Now that said. I have some bad disc's in my back and I have a lot of pain in my , Well down there I don't know but this may be some of your trouble ? I did not read all the feed backs so for give me if this is already been said. But if you ever need to talk Please e-mail me at gabby196@yahoo.com Your friend in pain, The Faber (fabian)

<< Previous Topic Next Topic >>

Yuku free message boards

How do you continue to live..

How do you continue to live..

Quick Reply